November 19, 2004
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Since there's no legal history of civil marriage being transportable to another state if that state opposes it as a matter of public policy, and since the 1996 Defense of Marriage Act enshrines that principle even more emphatically, and since even Massachusetts hasn't finally resolved its policy, real conservatives should wait and see.
Gee, you'd think that Sully would bother to actually look IN the Constitution when me makes statements such as this one. Hey Andrew, ever heard of the Full Faith and Credit clause? Or is that portion shaded on in your copy by the emanations and penumbras? I've heard of that before: it's called the "Shadow doctrine". I refer to it as the Bullshit doctrine, of course, but that's because I'm a maladjusted social misfit that actually believes what the Constitution says. I guess that that position is too nuanced for you.
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Good news on one front though: it appears that BJ's Wholesale Clubs, of which I am a happy member, has opened its doors to the annual red kettle drive. And of course Wal-Mart welcomes the Salvation Army every year. Time to go visit those two retailers whilst I fart in the general direction Target. For the record, they're building a Target across the street from my neighborhood BJ's. Guess which side of the street I won't be stopping on?
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I have acheived inner peace through writing about semen covered dinners, suicidal Santas and rock and roll.
Me? I use a different method to remain calm.
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A study conducted by UCLA's Department of Psychiatry has revealed that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle. For instance, if she is ovulating she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features. However, if she is menstruating, or menopausal, she is more prone to be attracted to a man with scissors lodged in his temple and a bat jammed up his ass while he is on fire.
Further studies are expected.
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02:06 PM
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Update: Welcome Instapundit readers! Stay and visit for a while, if you're so inclined. Especially if you like beer and beer gadgets. At least now I understand the spike in traffic.
Update #2: Turns out that I'm getting lots of links from Risawn, who's been getting swamped with her own Instalanche, which in turn sends people to me. Surprise! Anyway, I just wanted to thank Risawn for adding me to her blogroll. She required only minimal groveling, which was much appreciated. Being a married guy, I exceed my quota for begging every day before breakfast. However, forcing me to wash her car every day for the next 2 years seems a bit pricey.
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November 18, 2004
Good luck, everyone. I have confidence that you can do it. Remember: it's just one day. You can do anything for one day.
Update: this post will stay at the top of this blog until November 18 has passed.
Update: Just in case you needed any more reasons to quit. check out this article. Excerpt:
More than four million people die from smoking-related causes each year, making nicotine addition a leading cause of preventable mortality worldwide.
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There's a thought I've had for years, but rarely dare to speak publicly, lest I be branded some sort of hate-monger, but here it is:
If you get direct payments from the government, you don't get to vote.
Why? Because you've been bribed. There's a direct conflict of interest. If a judge had a direct financial stake in the outcome of a trial, he'd have to recuse himself. Why should voting be any different?
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. . . The leaders of Jewish communities should also act to distinguish defence of the State of Israel from the fight against anti-Semitism. . . .
Contextualising the memory of the Holocaust with that of other genocides and serious events in contemporary history in order to make sure that at the end of the day everyone can feel the Holocaust as their own tragedy, both Jews and non-Jews.
Recommentations:
In other words, according to the U.N. experts' draft report, discrimination against individual Jews is bad, while "anti-Zionism"--the denial to the Jewish people of an equal right to self-determination--is not. Since it is the perception of unconditional Jewish support for Israel that leads people to attack a Jewish cemetery, and anti-Semitism was absent from the Muslim world prior to the Arab-Israeli conflict (the mufti of Jerusalem and his friend Hitler notwithstanding), the way to defeat anti-Semitism is for Jews to cut loose defense of the state of Israel. And by the way, anti-Semitism will diminish if only we stop emphasizing the unique horror of the Holocaust.
I cannot begin to express my contempt for this bloated, parasitic organization. Suffice it to say that I will throw a party when the UN becomes a historical footnote.
Update: In a related matter, Pat Buchanan has trouble coming to grips with reality. Taranto has the scoop:
Pat Buchanan weighs in with a defense of Yasser Arafat against Boston Globe columnist Jeff Jacoby:
If, as Jacoby writes, Arafat "inculcated the vilest culture of Jew-hatred since the Third Reich," why did Ehud Barak offer him 95 percent of the West Bank and a capital in Jerusalem? Why did "Bibi" Netanyahu give him Hebron?
Why did Shimon Peres and Yitzhak Rabin share a Nobel Prize with him? Why did Bill Clinton invite him to the White House more times than any other leader? Were they all enablers of terrorism?
No.
Actually, the answer is yes--but Buchanan fails to acknowledge it even after the fact.
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Berkeley tolerates its homeless people, and takes good care of their stuff when they abandon it in shopping carts.
Not only does the city pack carts and other belongings into a huge container in case folks want it back -- it also deep-freezes them for as long as 90 days
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Critics say Berkeley's freezer program is an example of good intentions run amok. The city, which faces a $7.5 million deficit, should treat abandoned shopping carts as stolen property instead of worrying so much about the contents, they say.
"The amount of money wasted in this city is so outrageous it's ridiculous, '' said Jim Hultman, who learned of the cart freezing while fighting a $50,000- a-year program near his house that gave homeless people rented storage space.
I'll bet Jim sings a different tune when the townspeople show up at his front door wielding pitchforks and torches. The inhuman monster.
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They aren't buying the explanation that the Bad Ass Coffee Co. chain takes its name from the lovable-looking beasts used to haul beans in Hawaii.
"We're not promoting any body part," Liotta, a Lindenhurst resident whose franchise will be the first in the Chicago area, said Tuesday. "It is about the donkeys," which are featured on the company's signs.
But Marion Rush, who is leading a petition drive against the shop, isn't swallowing that argument.
"I'd be upset if someone came up to my child and said `badass,'" Rush said. "I would be upset if my daughter used the word `badass'."
On Monday, the Antioch Village Board agreed, passing a resolution condemning the name and likening it to a sort of moral apocalypse.
Moral apocalypse? Right.
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Not only is BalboaNaval Hospital receiving our injured heroes but the medical facilities at Camp Pendleton are also at near No Vacancy populations. In the latter case it's not money that is needed for our wounded Marines at Pendleton but stuff.
Here's why and what they need: At the beginning of Operation Iraqi Freedom, some of the spouses of the deployed Marines put together hundreds of recovery baskets in anticipation of wounded Marines arriving at our military hospitals. The purpose behind these baskets was to provide the wounded with personal items to be used during their hospital stay and to help fill up their days while being confined in the hospitals. However, due to the higher than anticipated numbers of wounded, they are all but out of the supplies to outfit these baskets.They are in need of the following items: nonperishable food (snacks and candy), DVDs, all sizes of batteries, phone cards, Game Boy games, books and magazines, Domino's Pizza gift certificates (they deliver on base), towels and wash cloths, and hygiene gear (razors and shaving cream).
These items can be sent to MSgt William Bonney, Office of the Division Inspector, 1st Marine Division Rein FMF, Bldg 1413 Room 200, Box 555380, Camp Pendleton, CA 92055-5380.
Our wounded Marines need our help. It's the least we can do in return.
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Now I hear that Tony Dungy, coach of the Indianapolis Colts, has weighed in with his disapproval, calling it "racially insensitive". I think he's just upset about someone showing up his players. After all, Nicolette Sheridan wrapped up TO pretty good, and that's a skill that his defense hasn't mastered yet.
Update: Best analysis yet over at the Kerry Spot.
Update: The Instamonster had this to say:
I saw the commercial for the first time in that broadcast, and I have to say that it was an absolute disgrace, and that it should not have been allowed to air. It didn't show nearly enough of Nicolette Sheridan to justify all the hoopla, and that's a tragedy because, despite her perhaps overdone plastic surgery, she's still hot.
Bah. Give me Terri Hatcher any day of the week. Any day that I don't happen to be married, of course.
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November 17, 2004
Hmm. I will have to think on this matter for a while longer.
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Dear Dogbert,When I order wine at a nice restaurant, the server hands me the cork. What
am I supposed to do with the stupid cork?Melissa
Dear Molester,This is your opportunity to show off your fine breeding. Confidently grab the cork and sniff daintily with one nostril while inserting a finger into the other nostril, up to the second knuckle. If the cork's odor is agreeable, take a bite of the cork and chew it while shuddering in delight. Then grab your throat, bug out your eyes, and make a choking noise. Grab a pen and write "Heimlich Maneuver" on a napkin and wave it for help. When no one offers to help, throw yourself over the back of a chair, land on your sternum, and spit cork debris in the direction of anyone who appears to be reaching for a disposable camera to record your death. Then sit back down and say to the server, "Very good."
Sincerely,Dogbert
Bastard must have been watching me at dinner the other night.
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06:16 PM
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