October 29, 2004

Halloween images

drunk pumpkin.jpg

Don't overindulge this Halloween.


"Uh, good evening Mr. Reynolds. Trick or treat?"


Self-hating dogs for Glenn.


Newly registered Democrat voters in Ohio display their support for Kedwards.


The future of Happy Meals if Glenn Reynolds has his way.


"Who's your daddy now, beeyatch?"


No Halloween would be complete without a visit from our special friend, Seymour Butz.


And the Puppy Blender's sphere of influence continues to grow.

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Election 2004 preliminary results

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Let's make it a stampede this time. Bring the Democrats back to sanity.

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A new disease discovered in Hollywood

I believe it's called silicon poisoning.

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Britney Spears in about 20 years

Singer Courtney Love appears in a Los Angeles criminal court for a preliminary hearing in her assault case on October 7, 2004 in Los Angeles, California.(AFP/Getty Images/Pool/File/Lee Celano)

Just a friendly warning, Britney.

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Okay, I'm aware

Eliabeth Hurley supports Breast Awareness month.


Update: Make that Breast Cancer Awareness month.

Update: No bullshit from the peanut gallery; I've lost several loved ones to breast cancer.

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I'm not going to sleep well for the next 5 days

And maybe not for 2 months afterwards, either. Edison Research has come up with multiple nightmare scenarios with regards to the Electoral College. Excerpt:

Scenario #1 – Electoral Vote Tie

Situation: The final Electoral Vote tally is 269 for Bush and 269 for Kerry.

Likelihood: Mathematically the chances are about 1 in 80, but the possible combinations of states that would create a 269-269 Electoral Vote tie are numerous. Simply by flipping New Hampshire and West Virginia from Bush to Kerry and having Kerry carry all of the states that Gore carried in 2000 would create an Electoral Vote tie.
Scenario #2 – The Proportional Electoral Vote Referendum in Colorado

Situation: Democrats have placed on the November 2nd ballot in Colorado a referendum that would change the method of allocating that state’s electoral votes. Currently like every other state, except Maine and Nebraska (which award electoral votes by Congressional District), Colorado awards all of its electors to the winner of the popular vote in the state. If this referendum passes, Colorado’s nine electoral votes would be awarded proportionally starting with the current election. If the electoral votes in Colorado had been awarded proportionally in 2000, Gore would have received three of Colorado’s eight electoral votes, and he would have won the electoral vote nationally 270 to 268. [Note that due to the new Census, Colorado has an additional electoral vote in 2004.]

Likelihood: First, the national electoral vote would need to be close enough for this procedure to make a difference. If there is a net swing of between 5 and 9 electoral votes from Bush to Kerry in the other 49 states then the outcome of the vote on this referendum would determine who is elected President.
Scenario #3 – Louisiana Senate run-off Election determines control of the Senate

Situation: Louisiana has a non-partisan primary for Senate scheduled for November 2nd. If no candidate receives a majority of the vote the top two finishers will face-off on Saturday, December 4th.

Likelihood: The Louisiana Senate is almost definitely going to go to a run-off. There are seven candidates on the ballot – one Republican, four Democrats and two Independents – so it will be almost impossible for one candidate to receive over 50% of the vote. The odds that control of the Senate is dependent upon this race are small but real. Currently the Senate composition is 51 Republicans, 48 Democrats and 1 Independent who votes with the Democrats (Jim Jeffords of Vermont). A net swing of one or two seats to the Democrats nationally will mean that Louisiana’s seat could be the one determining party control of the Senate.
Scenario #4 – Louisiana House run-offs determine control of the House of Representatives

Situation: As with the Senate race, Congressional elections in Louisiana require that a winning candidate receive 50% of the vote in order to avoid a December 4th run-off election. At least two Congressional Districts – and as many as four – in Louisiana are likely to have run-off elections on December 4th. If both parties are short of the 218 house seats needed for control, the outcomes of these run-offs would determine control of the House.

Likelihood: The Republicans currently have a 227-205 edge in the House (with one Democratic-leaning Independent and two formerly held vacant seats). If the Democrats have a net gain of 8-11 seats in the other 49 states, the Louisiana U.S. House races could determine control of the House. As of now the Democrats are unlikely to gain that many seats but it is still a possibility.

There's lots more. Read the whole thing. Try not to worry. Sure.

Update: Edison Research also provides us with a handy-dandy list of what to look for on election night.

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October 28, 2004

Beelzebub putting on his parka

Think I'm talking about the Red Sox Series triumph? Think again. Excerpt from the comments section to this post:

I stand by all my criticisms of Bush, and I still think that in a lot of ways, his reelection is going to do a lot of damage to the country. I also stand by my belief that Bush will do a lousy job on the War on Terror in a second term.

However, in the past couple weeks, it's become clear to me that the biggest danger is one I hadn't aprpeciated before: The enemies right here at home. I'm not talking just about your average Democrats. I think they're wrong about a lot of things, but they're not enemies. However, I'm talking about those on the left who despise America, and those who are trying to steal the election.

When the MSM, especially the NYT and CBS, is so in the tank for John Kerry that they're willing literally to make up phony story after phony story in order to defeat the President, then I just can't stay on the sidelines.

I feel sick about my vote. I think Bush is a really, really bad President. But right now, I hate to say it, the Media is worse.

The title of the post? CBS NEWS: ENEMY OF DEMOCRACY

I wonder how many other "fuck you, assholes" voters there are out there like Spoons who just itching to stick a hot poker into the eye of the lying sacks of shit currently inhabiting the MSM. Hopefully a lot. I've said it before, but if Kerry wins this election, all of the media elites will be able to proudly display their "Will Shamelessly Lie For Democrats" buttons without fear of repudiation. If they can continue to fucking lie on the air and in print even after their lies have been exposed, there's almost no hope left for this country. The American experiment will have finally failed. And no, I don't think I'm overstating the case.

Update: Joseph Farah, The Emperor and Spoons are all on record stating that there isn't anyway on God's green Earth that they would vote for Bush. All have now throw their support to our president. Do you think that the loony left has any inclination of just how badly they've screwed the pooch this time?

Update: Iowahawk publishes the best list of October Surprises for Bush that I've seen, bar none. I'm glad that someone can make me laugh about this crap.

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John Kerry's resume

Received via email:

NAME: John Kerry

7 mansions, including one in Washington DC, worth multi-millions. I served in Vietnam (four months).

Law Enforcement. In my career as a U.S. Senator, I've voted to cut every law enforcement, CIA, and Defense bill. I ordered the city of Boston to remove a fire hydrant in front of my mansion, thereby endangering my neighbors in the event of fire. I served in Vietnam (four months).

I served in Vietnam (four months). I used three minor injuries to get an early discharge from the military and service in Vietnam (as documented by the attending doctor). I served in Vietnam (four months). I then returned to the U.S., joined Jane Fonda in protesting the war, and insulted returning Vietnam vets, claiming they committed atrocities and were baby killers. I served in Vietnam (four months). I threw my medals, ribbons, or something away in protest. Or did I? My book "Vietnam Veterans Against the War: The New
Soldier", shows how I truly feel about the military. I served in Vietnam (four months).

I graduated from Yale University with a low C average. Unlike my counterpart George Bush, I have no higher education and did not get admitted to Harvard nor graduate with an M.B.A

After College and Vietnam, I ran for the U.S. Congress and have been there ever since. I have no real world experience except marrying very rich women and running their companies vicariously through them. I served in Vietnam (four months).

As a U.S. Senator I set the record for the most liberal voting record, exceeding even Ted Kennedy and Hillary Clinton. I have consistently failed to support
our military and CIA by voting against their budgets, thus gutting our country's ability to defend itself. Although I voted for the Iraq War, now I am against it
and refuse to admit that I voted for it. I voted for every liberal piece of legislation. I have no plan to help this country but I intend to raise taxes
significantly if I am elected. I served in Vietnam(four months).

My wealth so far exceeds that of my counterpart, George Bush, that he will never catch up. I make little or no charitable contributions and have never
agreed to pay any voluntary excess taxes in Massachusetts, despite family wealth in excess of $700 million. I served in Vietnam (four months).

I (we) own 28 manufacturing plants (Heinz) outside of the U.S. in places like Asia, Mexico and Europe. We can make more profit from the cheaper cost of labor in those Countries, although I blame George Bush for sending all of the other jobs out of Country. I served in Vietnam (four months).

Although I claim to be in favor of alternative energy sources, Ted Kennedy and I oppose windmills off Nantucket and Martha's Vineyard as it might spoil our
view of the ocean as we cruise on our yachts. I served in Vietnam (four months).

None. However, I served in Vietnam (four months).

I practice my Catholic faith whenever cameras are present. I ride a Serotta Bike. I love to ski/snowboard. I call my Gulfstream V Jet the "Flying Squirrel". I call my $850,000 42-foot Hinckley twin diesel yacht the "Scarmouche".

I am fascinated by rap and hip-hop and feel it reflects our real culture.

I own several "Large" SUVs including one parked at my Nantucket summer mansion, though I am against large, polluting, inefficient vehicles and blame George Bush for our energy problems. I served in Vietnam (four months).


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Someone else washes their hands of the Democrat party

John Cole is will be voting a party line GOP vote this year for the first time ever. Okay, he's making an exception for Perdue, who by all accounts is a decent individual. Excerpt:

The following individuals might want to get in touch with John Kerry, the DNC, CBS, and the NY Times and tell them 'thanks.'

Joe Manchin, III- (D.) candidate for governor of WV
Barbara Evans Fleishcauer- (D) candidate for the WV House of Delegates
Robert "Bob" Beach- (D) candidate for the WV House of Delegates

Why would you want to get in touch with the Kerry campaign? Because I had planned to vote for you in the general election, but because of Kerry's behavior the past two days, I decided to tell all Democrats to go to hell.
At any rate, I normally vote 40-50% Republican, 25% libertarian, 25% Democratic. Not this year. Every Democrat is guilty as far as I am concerened. YOu chose this man, you live with him. I refuse to reward the behavior I have seen over the past four years.

If you're not reading Balloon Juice daily, well, why not?

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A great new vision for our country

Here's a picture that clearly illustrates John Kerry's vision for this country. Think well on this, grasshopper, before you pull the lever for this guy.

JK vision.JPG

Image lifted from today's Nealz Nuze.

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October 26, 2004

Lucky in love

From an email that's been circling the globe since before Columbus discovered the New World.

A man was walking across the road when he met the accident. The impact
was on his head which caused him to be comatosed for two days before he
finally regained consciousness. When open his eyes, his wife was there
beside him.

He held her hands and said meaningfully : "You have always been beside
me. When I was a struggling university student, I failed again and again.
And sometimes, even my re-papers as well. You were always there beside me,
encouraging me to go on trying.."

She squeezed his hands as he continued :"When I went for all the major
interviews and failed to clinch any of the jobs, you were there beside
me, cutting out more adverts for me to apply..."

He continued "Then I started work at this little firm and finally got
to handle a big contract. I blew it because of one little mistake. And
you were there beside me."

Then I finally got another job after being laid off for sometime. But I
never seem to be promoted and my hard work was not recognised. As
such, I remained in the same position from the day I join the company till
now...And you were there beside me."

Her eyes brimmed with tears as she listened to her husband :"And now I
met an accident and when I woke up, you are here beside me....
....There's something I'd really like to say to you..."

She flung herself on the bed to hug her husband, and sobbing with

He said..., " I think you really bring me bad luck.."

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Commandments for the idle

Found the following list over at MSNBC:

No. 1 You are a modern day slave. There is no scope for personal fulfilment. You work for your pay-check at the end of the month, full stop.

No. 2 It's pointless to try to change the system. Opposing it simply makes it stronger.

No. 3 What you do is pointless. You can be replaced from one day to the next by any cretin sitting next to you. So work as little as possible and spend time (not too much, if you can help it) cultivating your personal network so that you're untouchable when the next restructuring comes around.

No. 4 You're not judged on merit, but on whether you look and sound the part. Speak lots of leaden jargon: people will suspect you have an inside track

No. 5 Never accept a position of responsibility for any reason. You'll only have to work harder for what amounts to peanuts.

No. 6 Make a beeline for the most useless positions, (research, strategy and business development), where it is impossible to assess your 'contribution to the wealth of the firm'. Avoid 'on the ground' operational roles like the plague.

No. 7 Once you've found one of these plum jobs, never move. It is only the most exposed who get fired.

No. 8 Learn to identify kindred spirits who, like you, believe the system is absurd through discreet signs (quirks in clothing, peculiar jokes, warm smiles).

No. 9 Be nice to people on short-term contracts. They are the only people who do any real work.

No. 10 Tell yourself that the absurd ideology underpinning this corporate bullshit cannot last for ever. It will go the same way as the dialectical materialism of the communist system. The problem is knowning when...

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Quote of the day

From Lileks, of course:

Also watched “Species,” for no reason I can recall, aside from the spectacular unholstered bosom of Natasha. Henstridge, who is otherwise untroubled by the burdens of talent.

What he said. And I really admire Natasha's ::cough-cough:: burden(s).

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Watch it online

So Sinclair Broadcasting caved and declined to show Stolen Honor on its stations. So what? You can watch it all online.

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Marketing to frat boys

So there's a cell phone addon that could allow you to see through dark bikinis. Interesting. Excerpt:

A Vodafone spokeswoman confirmed that the Peeping Tom accessory isn't a problem outside of Japan. She added that because Yamada Denshi is a third-party supplier, Vodafone's control is limited. "They are not an approved third party," she said.

"We would never go to market with a phone with any kind of capacity to see people naked," she said.

Not unless there's money to be made from it, of course.

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Now I'm worried

Dick Morris may be a great presidential advisor, but his track record as an election prognosticator is lousy. If he thinks that Bush has it in the bag, George is in trouble. Big trouble.

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I'm still waiting

Okay, Democrats, what will it be this time? You know what I mean. In 2000, you waited until right before the weekend to mention that Bush had had a DUI, knowing that the story would fester until election day. It almost worked. Now that people such as Dan Rather and Mark Halperin have been exposed as not so undercover operatives for the Kerry campaign, I expect something even worse. It won't matter if the story is factually correct or not. Rather will pontificate about the truth behind the story that people are ignoring. So what's it gonna be? I want the story to be ridiculous, outlandish and have no basis in reality whatsoever. Remember: you no longer have to rely on unreliable things like facts anymore. So have at it. I'll start making the popcorn right now in anticipation. It's going to be an entertaining weekend.

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October 25, 2004

Wielding a savage Cluebat™

Found this posted by Ramesh over at the Corner. It's so good I'm posting it in its entirety here:

BUSH ON TORA BORA [Ramesh Ponnuru]
What he didn't say in the debates: "Now my opponent is throwing out the wild claim that he knows where bin Laden was in the fall of 2001 -- and that our military had a chance to get him in Tora Bora. This is an unjustified and harsh criticism of our military commanders in the field. This is the worst kind of Monday-morning quarterbacking. And it is what we've come to expect from Senator Kerry." Bush then quotes Tommy Franks, before continuing, "Before Senator Kerry got into political difficulty and revised his views, he saw Tora Bora differently. In the fall of 2001, on national TV, Senator Kerry said, 'I think we have been doing this pretty effectively, and we should continue to do it that way.' At the time, Senator Kerry said about Tora Bora, 'I think we've been smart. I think administration leadership has done well, and we are on the right track.' End quote. All I can say is that I am George W. Bush, and I approve of that message."

Ouch. Mheh.

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We few. We happy few.

We band of brothers. Mheh.

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Ye Gods!

Don't click on this link if you're eating. Seriously. ?Thanks? to Annika for the link.

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