June 30, 2004

Stale PGH assignment

And moldy, too. Ever check your draft folder and realize that you DIDN'T publish something you thought you had? No? Okay then, it's just me. In any event, here's a month old PGH assignment: What are some possible signs that the anti-war crowd is getting REALLY desperate?

This assignment is bound to bring out either the snark or the beast in me. Maybe both. In any event, let's get down to business with my late assignment:

1) In an attempt to drum up more money for their cause, the wacko left has created an infomercial on cable television touting Michael Moore's Weight Loss Strategy. Act now and receive the free gift: Beauty Secrets of Helen Thomas.

2) Joe Isuzu hired as spokesperson for Moveon.org

3) The People's Republic of Berkeley passes a resolution to secede from the United States. Motion is rescinded when it's discovered that the rest of the country thought they already had.

4) Hippies mount a stuffed chimp to a wooden board as a symbol of their opposition to President Bush. A small ruckus ensues when the board turns out to be Al Gore.

5) Hippies drive around Iraq using bullhorns to broadcast the following message:

"There are no terrorists here! These people are our friends. The American people support the efforts of the so-called insurgents. As proof, we offer the number of members in our organization:

1,000
923
817
633
219
65 and still growing!"


Posted by: Physics Geek at 03:26 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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