July 03, 2006

Band Aids

An Irishman staggered home late after another evening at the pub with his drinking buddies. Shoes in left hand to avoid waking his wife, he tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step in the darkened entryway.

As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful.

Managing to suppress a yelp, the man sprung up, pulled down his pants, and examined his lacerated and bleeding cheeks in the mirror of a nearby darkened hallway, then managed to find a large full box of Band-aids and proceeded to place a patch as best he could on each place he saw blood.

After hiding the now almost empty box, he managed to shuffle and stumble his way to bed.

In the morning, the man awoke with searing pain in head and butt and his wife staring at him from across the room.

She said, "You were drunk again last night."

Forcing himself to ignore his agony, he looked meekly at her and replied, “Now, hon, why would you say such a mean thing?”

"Well," she said, "it could be the open front door, it could be the glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but, mostly....it's all those damn Band-aids stuck on the downstairs mirror.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 10:38 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 259 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Thank you. That was a work of art.

Posted by: JFC at July 26, 2006 11:05 PM (jRBci)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

Comments are disabled. Post is locked.
16kb generated in CPU 0.05, elapsed 0.1987 seconds.
91 queries taking 0.1783 seconds, 233 records returned.
Powered by Minx 1.1.6c-pink.