July 20, 2004

Required reading

I don't read the S-Train as often as I should. Case in point is this post. Excerpt:

I know why Quincy walked away. He was getting teary eyed. Just like me. I felt another weight lift off my shoulders during our brief conversation. We fought many times back in the day. Cut each other up real bad. And kept coming back for more. We were insane. Bloodthirsty. And here we are now; two thirty-something black men with families living the right way. Knowing what we did to each other in the past and meeting like that without the hate and anger was just too much. Folks, ain't no shame in my game. I cried like a baby in T-Steel's SUV. Couldn't stop crying. Didn't want to stop. Had to cry. Had to get it out. And my friend and road dawg T-Steel just driving and not consoling me. Just being there and letting me get it out. Cause I didn't need any consoling. I just needed a good friend to just drive and let me deal with it.

Looking back, I think I cried for all the people I hurt. My friends, enemies, and myself. And I think I cried tears of joy, too. Joy in that I'm alive and doing the right thing. Didn't think I had that much pent up emotion in me still. But I feel better now. Something about seeing and talking with an "enemy" that gave my soul a shake. A positive shake.

I can't think of anything useful to add. Link found via the Inoperable Terran.

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But doctor, I came in to have a hangnail removed

All men flinch when they see another guy get crunched in the groin; it's hardwired into their psyche. Imagine their reaction to this story. Ugh. Very feeble thanks to Jonah for the link.

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The sun goes down? It's Bush's fault

At least, that seems to be the common sentiment among the drooling idiots. Example #1 is Courtney Love:

Despite everything, Love believes her predicament is the result of a coordinated financial, legal and personal smear campaign. In a recent interview with London's Sunday Telegraph, she was asked if she bears any responsibility for her current problems.

"The last thing I want to say is, 'I'm a victim', but I am. I believe it's a trickledown from Bush ... I should have done an audit. I should have done face-time with people. That is true. But did I bring it on myself? I don't think so."

And I believe that you're Britney Spears, the Last Generation.

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Help, help, I'm being repressed!

At least, I'm sure that's how some loonies will spin this story. It's a little disappointing because I'm a huge Linda Ronstadt fan. However, I had an inkling she was wingnut back when she dated Governor Moonbeam Brown of California. It's good to see that the general public isn't taking this sort of crap lying down anymore. Excerpt:

Singer Linda Ronstadt was thrown out of the Aladdin casino in Las Vegas on the weekend after dedicating a song to liberal film maker Michael Moore and his movie "Fahrenheit 9/11," a casino spokeswoman said on Monday.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 01:52 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Well, it's better than my excuses...

Looks like Graumagus has finally posted an explanation from his complete lack of Alliance homework lately. Excerpt:

Susie: "Have you had any weird dreams lately?"

Me: "Well there's the one with Alysson Hannigan and me in a tub filled with haggis...."

It's good to see someone even more demented and twisted than me.

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July 19, 2004

Revised blonde Michael Moore supporter joke

A Michael Moore supporter bought two horses, and could never
remember which was which.

A neighbor suggested that she cut the tail of one horse and that
worked great until the other horse got his tail caught in a bush.

It tore just right and looked exactly like the other horse's tail and
our Michael Moore supporter was stuck again.

The neighbor suggested she notch the ear of one horse.

That worked fine until the other horse caught his ear on a barbed
wire fence.

Once again our friend couldn't tell them apart.

The neighbor suggested she measure the horses for height.

When she did, she was very pleased to find that the white horse
was 2 inches taller than the black one.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 08:40 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Required reading

Orson Scott Card keeps churning thoughtful, well-written columns. Excerpt:


How stupid are Americans?

I think the answer is:
As dumb as we wanna be.

Twelve years ago, Bill Clinton realized he couldn't get a majority to vote for him as a Democrat. So he pretended to be a Republican. He co-opted the Republican position on practically every issue. He left poor President Bush, Sr., with nothing to say except "me too."

And Bush was the incumbent.

Clinton's message back then was: Bush is a complete failure, and I'm going to make everything better by following exactly the same policies.

...

And Kerry is stealing a page from the Clinton election handbook by focusing on the exact issue where the Republicans have him beaten.

He's not pulling a Howard Dean and raving about pulling our troops out.

No, he's talking like Clinton: Bush has done a terrible, terrible job. Elect me and I'll do a lot better with this war on terror. And you know how I'll do it?

By doing every single thing that President Bush has done. Only I would have done it sooner and better.

Read the whole thing.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 08:15 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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A retirement plan for the rest of us

If you bought $1000 of Nortel stock a year ago, it would now be worth
$49.

With Enron, you would have $16.50 left of the original $1,000.

With WorldCom, you would have less than $5 left.

Now, if you bought $1,000 worth of Coors Light (the beer, not the
stock) over the past year, drank all the beer, then turned in the cans
for the aluminum recycling price, you would have $214.

Based on these figures, my current investment advice is to drink
heavily and recycle! This is my new retirement program. I call it my
401Keg.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 05:30 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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No one under 17 admitted without a guardian

Blame Harvey for me posting more quiz results: he linked to the quiz. although he tries to blame LeAnn for it. Bad Harvey! Anyway, here's the rating for my life:


My life is rated R.
What is your life rated?

Posted by: Physics Geek at 05:08 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Mark Steyn vs. Joe Wilson

And the results are predictable. Excerpt:

In his ludicrously vain memoir The Politics Of Truth, Wilson plays up his knowledge of the country. He makes much of his intimacy with Wanke and gives himself the credit for ridding Niger of the Wanke regime. The question then is why a man who knew so much about what was going on chose deliberately to misrepresent it to all his media/ Democrat buddies, not to mention to the American people. For a book called The Politics Of Truth, it's remarkably short of it. On page 2, Wilson says of his trip to Niger: "I had found nothing to substantiate the rumors." But he had.

That's what lying is, by the way: intentional deceit, not unreliable intelligence. And I'm not usually the sort to bandy the liar-liar-pants-on-fire charge beloved by so many in our politics today, but I'll make an exception in the case of Wilson, who's never been shy about the term. He called Bush a "liar" and he called Cheney a "lying sonofabitch," on stage at a John Kerry rally in Iowa.

Saddam wanted yellowcake for one reason: to strike at his neighbors in the region, and beyond that at Britain, America and his other enemies. In other words, he wanted the uranium in order to kill you.

The obvious explanation for Wilson's deceit about what he found in Africa is that his hatred of Bush outweighed everything else*. Or as the novelist and Internet maestro Roger L. Simon put it, "He is a deeply evil human being willing to lie and obfuscate for temporary political gain about a homicidal dictator's search for weapons-grade uranium."

Technically, it's weaponizable uranium, not "weapons grade." But that's the point. Simon isn't the expert, and, as Ambassador Wilson trumpets loudly and often, he is. This isn't a case of another Michael Moore, court buffoon to the Senate Democrats, or Whoopi Goldberg, has-been potty-mouth to John Kerry. They're in show biz; what do they know?

But Wilson does know; he went there, he talked to officials, and he lied about America's national security in order to be the anti-Bush crowd's Playmate of the Month. Either he's profoundly wicked or he's as deranged as that woman on the Paris Metro last week who falsely claimed to have been the victim of an anti-Semitic attack. The Paris crazy was unmasked within a few days, but the Niger crazy was lionized for a full year.

* And there it is in a nutshell: lying, fabrications and distortions are the name of the game when it comes to defeating Bush. I'd say that the Left should be ashamed, but they consistently shown that they have no shame. Nothing they do is wrong as long as it serves the higher purpose of winning the election. People on right side of the political spectrum would be well served to remember this. To defeat your opponent, you must first understand him; I understand the other side all too well. Conservatives/Libertarians/ non-deranged Democrats(and there are still many, despite the party's embrace of the Michael Moore-DU wingnuts) need to know that the other side's idea of playing fair means that they win. Always. Remember that.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 02:44 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Mr. Jaws, 2004

"He's coming on to the boat! Mr. Jaws, why are you grabbing my hand?"

"Wouldn't you give your hand to a friend?"

"Wait a minute, that's not how this record is supposed to end..."

If you're too young to know what I'm talking about, don't tell me.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 02:19 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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July 16, 2004

Revised blonde Michael Moore supporter joke

Two Michael Moore supporters and a brunette were walking down the beach when a seagull dumps a load on one of the Michael Moore supporters. The brunette says "I'll go and get some toilet paper. " When she left, one Michael Moore supporter turns to the other one and says "Boy,is she ever stupid. By the time she gets back, that seagull will be miles away."

Posted by: Physics Geek at 08:19 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Looking for a fun date?

Then you might want to ask this girl out. You might not want to be eating much, though.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 03:37 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Help me, I'm sick

So being overweight is now classified as an illness, which means our freaking tax dollars will be spent on "curing" people. Okay, I have to say it: bull and shit. If I catch the flu, that's an illness. My grandmother died from cancer, which is known in some circles as a disease. My sister suffers from an autoimmune disorder, which means that she's sick pretty much full-time. In the last 2 years, I gained 20 pounds. Did that mean I was sick? Am I taking antibiotics to help me? Will drinking chicken soup cure me? Of course not, because I'M F**CKING FAT!!!. Ohmigod! What can I do if the government won't spend money on my treatment? I'll tell you what: I've restricted my caloric intake and started running again after a 2-1/2 year layoff. I'm down 11 pounds and counting. Overeating is not a disease. It's a bad habit or a lack of will, sometimes both. Fuck. I'm absolutely sick of crybabies whining that they aren't responsible for their own actions. Useless pissants.

I'll offer one caveat: 10 years ago a friend of mine(about 100 pounds overweight) was diagnosed with a thyroid disorder. His doctor told him that if he continued taking the supplement and didn't change his eating habits, he'd lose about 1 poung a month. So yes, there is some small, insignificant portion of the population that actually have diseases that can contribute to their obesity. Eating like a pig doesn't qualify as one of those illnesses.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 02:37 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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That's going to leave a mark

Attention smokers: methane is flammable. That is all.

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July 15, 2004

An idea whose time has come

Looks like some of our legislators have decided to act as they can and should. Excerpt:

A Federal Marriage Amendment to the Constitution was blocked in the Senate Wednesday, although supporters said it was needed to stop federal courts from ruling DOMA unconstitutional.

But Indiana Congressman John Hostettler (HOH'-stet-lur) notes that the Constitution gives Congress the power to remove issues -- in this case, challenges to DOMA -- from federal courts' jurisdiction. The full House is expected to consider his bill next week.

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Peggy Noonan clarifies her position

Well, this article expalined somewhat the position taken in this one, which had some of us scratching our heads. Take Mike's response in his Issue Table:

Issue: Kerry for President

Dem/Left position: Kaus, Noonan, and others say we ought to elect Kerry because Americans “need a breather” from WoT
*shocked silence*

Bush/Right position: ....is this some kind of joke?

Result/The trouble for the left is: Yet to be seen, but if this idea takes hold we might as well take our marbles, go home, and go ahead and build a damned fence around the continental US and quiver behind it from now on; get back to me when al Qaeda declares a “vacation” ceasefire; I don’t recollect any “breathers” during WW2, either; suck it up and grow a pair, for Christ’s sake

I have to say that if the general electorate chooses John Kerry because they think that emulating an ostrich(yes, I know that they don't really hide their heads in the sand) will be better for them, well, we're all screwed. Indolence and stupidity are no way for a country to survive. Go check your history books if you're not convinced. Make sure that it's a book written more than 20 years ago, though. You know why.

Update: The Puppy Blender posts an excellent email from Austin Beay with a followup from Rick Richman. Excerpt:

If they know that Bush will be there for four more years, with a mandate from the American people (earned after a campaign of unprecedented personal and political vilification by those who opposed the liberation of Iraq), decisions in Syria, Iran, North Korea and other places (including France and Germany) are going to be different.

Conversely, if the American electorate can be convinced to remove the commander-in-chief of the war on terror, to be replaced by the Education President, the Environmental President, etc. and his Two Americas vice-president, all of these other state actors will make decisions in a very different direction. They will perhaps not be able to see the subtety of a "breather" and "time out" and may mistake it for what it may in fact turn out to be: a surrender (except, of course, for the continuation of our 9/10 law enforcement and intelligence activities).

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It's not like he wasn't punished enough

A guy in London accidentally shoots off his own testicles with a shotgun. The kicker? He's getting 5 years in jail for illegally posessing a firearm. Effing British wanker laws.

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I'm a big loser!

Yes you are. Thanks to A_SDF for the link.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 01:35 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Revised blonde Michael Moore supporter joke

A State Trooper pulls a car over on a lonely back road and
approaches the Michael Moore supporter driving. "Ma'am, is
there a reason that you're weaving all over the road"?

The mindless idiot replied, "Oh officer, thank goodness you're here!!
I almost had an accident! I looked up and there was a tree right in
front of me. I swerved to the left and there was another tree in
front of me. I swerved to the right and there was another tree
in front of me!"

Reaching through the side window to the rear view mirror, the
officer replied, "Ma'am ... that's your air freshener."

Posted by: Physics Geek at 03:15 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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