July 11, 2005
Cheese: You want a beer or somethin'?
Rowling: Thank you, but I'll pass. I'm not much of a drinker.
Cheese: Suit yourself. Can you grab me one, though? I'm parched.
Rowling: Excuse me?
Cheese: A beer. I could use one. They're on the bottom shelf of the fridge.
Rowling: ... ... ... Well, I... I guess.
J.K. walks to my refrigerator and hands me a beer.
Cheese: Thanks, honeynipples. You're a good woman. Hey, you kinda look like that chick from Twisted Sister.
Cheese: You know, [sings] "I wanna rock! ROCK! Duh duh da duh, duh duh da duh, DAAH DAAH! I wanna ROCK! ROCK!"
Rowling: Oh, you mean the band-
Cheese: "ROCK! Duh duh da duh, duh duh da duh, DAAH DAAH! I want - to - ROCK! ROCK!"
Rowling: Yes, I understand who you're talking about. That's not a "chick." It's Dee Snider.
Cheese: "Chick," "woman," whatever. I don't know what you people call yourselves these days. In another month, you'll change it again anyway.
July 09, 2005
Update: Recommended dowload: FeedDemon for RSS feeds.
July 08, 2005
1) One anagram for IMAO is MAO I. That commie.
2) Frank isn't his real name. He had changed from John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmitt because people kept confusing him with the other guy.
3) Frank J. loves monkeys
July 07, 2005
But they really screwed up with Britain. Any student of history would know that unlike some other Europeans, the British will withstand almost certain destruction rather than be cowed. Battle of Britain anyone? And where do these filthy pieces of human debris think that the term "stiff upper lip" comes from? Did they somehow think it was the kind of hard-on that terrorists get when they get the urge to go murder some innocents? What a colossal error.
Make no mistake: the usual bend-over-and-grab-our-ankles crowd will be up to their usual tricks, wringing their hands, wondering Why Do They Hate Us ™ and blaming the BusHitler and Tony Blair for all these deaths. That type of bullshit is already underway. However, I will make a prediction and guess that most Brits will bury their dead, grieve quietly and then roll up their sleeves as they engage the enemy. Again.
To all of our friends and cousins in Britain, I can only say this: we grieve with you.
Update: Sullivan has lots of links, as well as things of his own to say. Excerpt:
How dumb are these fascists to take on the Brits and the Americans? Sure, we fight with each other; but up against this kind of evil, our divisions are petty. I also admire Livingstone's ability to see how liberal and left-wing Londoners who have helped build an amazingly vibrant, diverse and tolerant city are particularly affronted by these medieval monsters. Maybe this will help build support for a war that is as unavoidable as it is unlosable. I don't mean we won't continue to differ over means and methods and tactics and strategy. We will. That's our strength. But right and left, we are in this together.
Andrew understands the difference between opponent and enemy. Some others that I won't specify don't seem to get the distinction.
Update: A strong on security Democrat takes his political brethren to task:
As a Democrat, I'm very happy that the lefty blogosphere wasn't around much on September 11. Because if they were, and they uncorked the response they are uncorking to the London bombings, Democrats might never be electable again in my lifetime.
Update: OUr war-mongering SecDef shared his thoughts following this despicable, cowardly act:
But if these terrorists thought they could intimidate the people of a great nation, they picked the wrong people and the wrong nation. For generations, tyrants, fascists, and terrorists have sought to carry out their violent designs upon the British people only to founder upon its unrelenting shores.
Before long, I suspect that those responsible for these acts will encounter British steel. Their kind of steel has an uncommon strength. It does not bend or break.
The British have learned from history that this kind of evil must be confronted. It cannot be appeased. Our two countries understand well that once a people give in to terrorists demands, whatever they are, their demands will grow.
The British people are determined and resolute. And I know the people of the United States are proud to stand at their side.
Update: Jen offers a brief history lesson that our enemy might want to read. Since they're too busy wathcing porn and drinking whiskey while calling us Infidel scum!, they probably won't notice.
A woman meets a gorgeous man in a bar. They talk, they connect, they end up leaving together. They get back to his apartment and she notices that his bedroom is completely packed with sweet cuddly teddy bears. Hundreds of cute small bears on a shelf all the way along the floor, cuddly medium-sized ones on a shelf a little higher, and huge enormous bears on the top shelf along the wall.
The woman is surprised that this guy would have a collection of teddy bears, especially one that's so extensive, but she decides not to mention this to him, and actually is quite impressed by his sensitive side. She turns to him. They kiss....and then they rip each other's clothes off and make hot steamy l-o-v-e.
After an intense night of passion with this sensitive guy, they are lying there together in the after glow, the woman rolls over and asks, smiling, "Well, how was it?"
The guy says: "Help yourself to any prize from the bottom shelf."
July 06, 2005
Man, I just dont get it. There are lots of other American groups who are joining us against Bushs crusade, like David Duke and Fred Phelps and Stormfront. But who do I get automatically lumped in with? East Village Rage Against My Allowance fuckwits in Fred Perry tracksuits who cant figure out the controls on an iPod, let alone an international revolution.
I love the smell of lunacy in the morning. But not hippies. I mean really. Ugh.
A lot of men allow women's cruelty and dishonesty turn them into users; guys who nail as many women as possible, while shielding themselves completely from emotional involvement. This generally happens in high school. I may be an evil sexist, but I haven't done that. It's because my emotions are involved that I'm careful. I may be bitter, but I still think of women as people, not "pelts" or "slags" or whatever the latest slang term is.
Finally, I realize not all women are bad. I figure a man meets about two women every five years whom he should beg to marry him, and those women are true blessings. Unfortunately, I have a habit of missing the boat. I was too old when I finally understood what women are, and how important it is to pursue the good ones when you have the chance. I always knew what I wanted; I just didn't know how rare it was and how to separate it from the decoys.
Lots of my friends-especially my female friends- used to wonder why I was still single at the ripe old age of 35. I didn't have any prospects at the time, either. Some accused me of being "picky", like that was some sort of character flaw. I'll let you in on a little secret: finding someone that you might want to go out on dates with is easy. Finding someone that you actually envision spending your life with is hard. And when you're 30+, you need to be more discriminating that when you were 18. Let's face it: if you date someone for two years in your 20's and it doesn't work out, it'll hurt, but you'll recover. If you're 30+ or 40+, wasting a couple of years of your life on a relationship that you know won't last is just plain stupid.
I've never believed that there's only one perfect someone for each person. There are probably several thousand out there. Problem is that they aren't always available when you meet them. The trick is to be ready when they are free. Trust me: good women/men aren't usually on the market long. If you diddle around always looking for the greener grass and discover too late that you discarded the best lawn in town, well, that's just too bad. Keep looking. If you're lucky, you'll run into another one of your soulmates. Try not to be so stupid next time. You may not get another chance.
Update: I should have guessed that someone with her finger on the pulse of today's culture would have noticed this first. And Michele's reaction is pretty much the same as mine.
An article on Title IX in the Wall Street Journal today includes a brief discussion of how Billie Jean Kings defeat of Bobby Riggs in a September 1973 tennis match was a milestone in womens sports. Maybe so, but it is less and less noted that, just a few months before, the 55-year-old Riggs had defeated in straight sets the then number-one ranked womens player, Margaret Court. (And of course there is the school of thought that Riggs, a notorious hustler, threw the match to King, either because he had bet against himself, or because he wanted to be able to hype a rematch. Riggs denied this.) Just trying to keep this out of the memory hole.
July 05, 2005
Note: All temperatures listed below are in degrees Fahrenheit. If you need to convert to degrees Celsius, here's a handy-dandy tool.
1) Immerse your cans of hopped malt extract in warm water for about 20-30 minutes. This will make it much easier to remove the syrup from the cans, which is a good thing. Malt extract syrup is gummy, sticky stuff. Dump the cans of malt extract into your brewing kettle which should already contain 1-1/2 gallons(US). If you use filtered water, you 'll be fine. If you don't, you might consider buying some "drinking water"; distilled water isn't a good choice. Regardless, bring all ingredients to a boil for 15 minutes. If you happened to buy some hop pellets, add 1/2 ounce 10 minutes into the boil, or 5 minutes from the end. This will impart a nice hop aroma to your beer. However, this step is entirely optional. No hops? No worries.
2) Sanitize your fermenter in a dilute solution of bleach and water. Add 1/4 cup bleach to your empty plastic fermenter and fill with cold water. Let stand for about 20 minutes and then rinse thoroughly with hot water to remove all traces of chlorine.
NOTE***: Sanitizing your equipment is the single most important thing that you will do when making your beer. Fortunately, it's also one of the easiest.
3) Add 3 gallons of filtered(or bottled) water to your sanitized fermenter. It should be cold; room temperature isn't good enough. An hour or two in the fridge should be sufficient.
4) Carefully, pour your hot wort(that's the mixture of hops, malt and water you've been boiling on your stove) into the plastic fermenter, splashing noisily. This will provide sufficient aeration for the little yeasties that you'll be adding.
Note: If you jumped the gun and bought a glass carboy, you'll need to use extra care. Make certain the 3 gallons of water you dumped into it are very cold. This will prevent the carboy from breaking due to the thermal shock of having boiling water added to it. Also, you'll need to pour the hot wort through a funnel to get it into the carboy. Then swirl the water around to make certain everything's been mixed well.
Optional Take a specific gravity reading using your hydrometer. It comes with a little tube in which you'll place some beer and then float the hydrometer on it. Feel free to skip this step for your first batch.
5) Add the yeast when the temperature drops below 78 degrees. You'll want to sanitize your thermometer before using it; I usually dip mine in some cheap vodka, which prevents the possibility of some nasty chemicals getting into the beer.
6) Seal the lid onto your plastic fermentation vessel and attach the fermentation lock. Again, I prefer to use vodka in the lock, as opposed to any type of sanitizing solution. Should the temperature drop suddenly, it will be vodka getting sucked back into my beer instead of bleach. If you're using a glass fermenter, sanitize the rubber cork, plug the carboy and attach the fermentation lock to that. Everything else stays the same.
Within a couple of days, and probably within the first 24 hours, an agressive fermentation will begin. The lock will be bubbling like crazy.
7) Sometime between day 7 and day 14, the fermentation will complete. When there's no noticeable activity in the fermentation lock for a couple of days, your beer will be ready to bottle. Which will be the topic of the next post in this series.
Update: After my fermentation lock foamed over from the fermenting beer, it occurred to me that maybe I should mentioned a little thing called a blow-off tube. What is it? Simply a piece of flexible plastic tubing inserted into the stopped hole where your fermentation lock goes. If you're fermenting in either a 6-1/2 gallon plastic pail or a 6-1/2 gallon carboy, a blow-off tube is unnecessary. If, like me, you're using a 5-1/2 glass carboy, a blow-off tube is pretty useful. Otherwise, you'll find foam pouring out of the top of your fermentation lock when you go check on your beer. Anyway, here's what you do:
6A) Seal the lid onto your plastic fermentation vessel and attach the blowoff tube. Submerge the open end of the tube into a dish containing an inch or so of water. After a few days, or when foam stops pouring out of your tube, remove the tube from the runner stopper and attach the fermentation lock. All other info in #6 above remains the same.
I am a veteran and my son is now serving. By your lights these amounts to a double credit for me to speak about the war. Also by your lights, you yourserf suffer from a double deficit, since you have never served and have no immediate family member serving. Therefore, your logic would inexorably find that my opinion is of magnitudes greater value than yours.
Do you agree? If not, why not?
I support a vigorous prosecution of the war in Iraq and have written several times (i.e., here) that it is the actual focal point of the war against Islamist terrorism.
Do you now, therefore, consider yourself well instructed and will you, therefore, bow to my experience and insights (which by your own standards are far superior to yours) and now fully support prosecuting the Iraq war until victory is achieved? If not, why not?
Finally, on what basis can you persuade me that you, personally, are not simply a coward of the most craven kind who hides behind anti-war cliches merely to keep intact your own precious skin?
A man who rescued a swimmer caught in swirling river currents found himself in trouble soon afterward when he was arrested by authorities who claimed he was interfering.
Dave Newman, 48, disobeyed repeated orders by emergency personnel to leave the water, police said. He was charged with interfering with public duties.
Funny. I didn't know allowing someone to drown was a public duty. My bad.
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