From this week's Sportspickle:

Ponder This...
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Phil Mickelson bragged in the lead up to his season debut at last weekendÂ’s Bob Hope Classic that he had dropped 25 pounds in the offseason. Little good it did him. He fired a final round 6-over 78 and finished in 45th place, 10 shots behind the leaders. Clearly Mickelson just doesnÂ’t get it. We donÂ’t watch him in hopes heÂ’ll play great golf thanks to his physical fitness. Just like no one would like Pamela Anderson any more if she took acting classes or began wearing tasteful and conservative turtlenecks. Phil, we watch you because in the midst of a four or five hour broadcast in which dorky men stroll past our screen in khakis and polo shirts, you offer us delicious eye candy in the form of bouncy, voluptuous breasts. Once you lose those youÂ’re nothing but another shmoe in Dockers who loses to Tiger Woods every week.
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Here is my Page 2 column from Monday. I should mention that I’ve always had a certain perception about the average, rank-and-file Boston sports fan – both from firsthand interaction and from observing them from afar through the media. And the perception is this: the average, rank-and-file Boston sports fan is an insufferable douche bag who leaves much to be desired in the intelligence department. But I have always been one who is willing to admit when I am wrong. So today I will do that, as the e-mails I received from Patriots fans in response to the column above showed me the error of my ways and I must apologize. The average, rank-and-file Boston sports fan is not an insufferable douche bag who leaves much to be desired in the intelligence department. Far from it. They are actually very nearly mentally retarded, if not legitimately disabled, and for that they should be helped, not vilified. (Seriously, Boston douchery – you didn’t pick up on that column being tongue-in-cheek? You honestly believed I really Tom Brady and Bill Belichick will never win a Super Bowl, even though they have won three already? Really? Wow. Just wow.)

This one's gonna become a weekly read, just like TMQ.

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