April 23, 2008

How to celebrate in style

Someone asked me how I celebrated Earth Day. He seemed quite offended when I told that I burned 100 gallons of kerosene and 200 pounds of coal while running the AC in all of my cars and my house, with the windows wide open. Also, I ate a crapload of beans so that I wouldn't ignore the methane production. After all, I can't have a bunch of bovine farm animals leading the way, because that would be just wrong.

In case you were wondering, the person in question avoids eye contact with me now. I'm at a loss to explain as to why this is the case.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 11:15 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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April 21, 2008

Getting better

Today, the lovely and talented Rachel Lucas celebrates her [computer error] birthday. Go buy her something. Better yet, give her some cold hard cash.

I'd ask y'all to give me something, but (a) it's not my birthday and (b) I don't have any links up for PayPal or Amazon. Besides, I'd feel bad at the number of people who'd swallow their tongues from laughing hystericall, so consider it a public service on my part.

Update: Okay, Rachel publicly posted her age, which I already knew. However, I will continue to be a gentleman and not mention that she's now 36 years old. Yeah, I'm good like that.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 08:22 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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April 18, 2008

And on the seventh day he said SUVs were killing the planet

Maybe, just maybe, the Pope should stick to what he knows, such as spiritual matters, rather than lecturing me on the virtues of accepting whatever pronouncements the dictator-fellating fuckwits at the UN have to say about pretty much anything, including, but not limited to, global warming. Excerpt:

Countries that act unilaterally on the world stage undermine the authority of the United Nations and weaken the broad consensus needed to confront global problems, Pope Benedict said on Friday.

From your mouth to God's ears.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 12:20 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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April 14, 2008

Teh grammar sukz!!

John Scalzi, noted grammar authoritarian:

Dear writers in the English language:

“Alright” is not a word. You’re looking for “all right.” For everyone confused by reading in the dictionary that “alright” is a “non-standard usage,” thus maybe okay to use, you should know that “non-standard usage” is polite lexicographer speak for “version used by illiterate hamster pokers,” and when you’re not looking, they all point and laugh at you. Yes, they do. I’ve seen them do it. And it was mean.

In a followup post, Mr. Scalzi displays the picture that is worth a thousand words:

hamster butt poker.jpeg

Posted by: Physics Geek at 10:35 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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April 02, 2008

Apparently, some people are too stupid to realize that they're also crazy

And by crazy, I mean absolute batshit, bugfuck, should be in a wraparound coat in a padded room crazy. Jonah Goldberg links to some nutjob who forths at the mouth in her hatred of Firefly. Now, I've got no problem with people not liking Firefly. Such a person is, of course, a moron, but that doesn't mean he/she is insane. In this case though, we've definitely left reality far, far behind. And check out this reply in the comment thread:

Very articulately written. You've really untangled the woman-hating mess of this show, not an easy thing to do when there's so many levels of it.

Normally, I wouldn't link to such drivel, but I got an enormous laugh out of it and figured that you might need a chuckle today, too.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 01:54 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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Help someone in need

Andrea Harris needs a little help. I've seen bloggers offer some spare change when others have been in trouble, such as Lileks, Dean and Jeff Goldstein, among others. Well, our little Twisted Spinster could use some of your extra quarters right now. Go now.

If you don't have any spare cash (and I've been there more times than I'd care to remember), post a link and spread the word.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 07:52 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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April 01, 2008

Dogs and cats living together

Okay, I get that Rachel Lucas' site is a bit more potty-mouthed than mine, if for no other reason than I tend to cuss in her comments, which probably tends to raise her score. But Dr. Helen? I came in behind the pleasant Dr. Helen's blog on the Cuss-O-Meter?

The Blog-O-Cuss Meter - Do you cuss a lot in your blog or website?

Seriously, WTF? It's time to break out the Seven Words You Can't Say On TV: shit-piss-fuck-cunt-cocksucker-motherfucker-tit. Also, fart, turd and twat, because George Carlin felt compelled to add those later.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 07:30 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
Post contains 89 words, total size 1 kb.

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