And the only cure is more cowbell.

Michele correctly notes that disco got what it deserved. Unfortunately, the rest of us have horrid, horrid lyrics seared- seard, I tell you- into our memories from that thankfully gone era.

How badly seared? Check out what I can do without using a search engine. And then weep for me.

I'm glad you're home.
Well, did you really miss me?
I guess you did by the look in your eye (look in your eye, look in your eye)
Well lay back and relax while I put away the dishes.
Then you and me can rock a bell.

You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell.
You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell.
You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell.
You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell.

The night is young and full of possibilities.
Well come on and let yourself be free.
My love for you, so long I've been savin'
Tonight was made for me and you

You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell .
You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell .
You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell .
You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell .

You can ring my bell, you can ring my bell, ding, dong, ding, ah-ah, ring it!
You can ring my bell, anytime, anywhere, ring it, ring it, ring it, ring it, oww!
You can ring my bell, you can ring my bell, ding, dong, ding, ah-ah, ring it!
You can ring my bell, anytime, anywhere, ring it, ring it, ring it, ring it, oww!

You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell.
You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell.
You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell.
You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell.

I would pay good money to have that erased from my brain.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 04:51 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Alexandra Pelosi takes a walk through Jesusland with her camera. Much like a chimpanzee reading Nietzche, she has zero understanding of what she sees.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 10:33 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Ace types a letter to Paris Hilton that echoes my own thoughts.

I know what you're thinking: you were a physics geek in college; you'd have hit anything. While that sounds reasonable because, umm, well, physics majors and girls are the twain that don't meet, you'd be wrong because logic is a physicist's forte. And logically speaking, I wouldn't hit something that makes the a $10 dollar crack whore on the street corner look reputable by comparison. PH reminds me of the girl who effed the entire football team in high school and then followed that up by humping the team mascot: a pot-bellied pig. Poor pig.

Let's face it: PH has the morals of an alley cat on Spanish fly, the muscle tone of a cadaver and enough creepy crawlies in and around her cooch to kill most of the first, second and third world. The fact that some people think she's sexy disturbs me quite a lot.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 05:37 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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And edible, crotchless panties worn by ALL NUDE!!! ALL THE TIME!!! Jessica Alba and Angelina Jolie Jello-wrestling. Okay, so it's not up to this guy's standard of Google baiting. Then again, what is?

Now I'll start checking Sitemeter every 10 minutes.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 10:06 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Tired of paying for each call to information? Try this on for size:

Tired of paying $1.50 or $2 for every directory assistance phone call? Then don't. There truly is such a thing as free directory assistance, though it may cost you a little in time and patience. Jot this down:

1-800-FREE411.

A Boston-based company called Jingle Networks offers this free alternative to expensive 411 calls via your cell phone or land line. How and why do they do what they do for free? Just as radio and TV shows are supported by advertising, the directory assistance service is sponsored by companies advertising with the service. So, yes, that means you may hear a short, audio ad when requesting a phone number, but not every time.

When I tried it out, the automated system got the name I was requesting wrong, but a live operator quickly came on the line and found the phone number. I heard (and ignored) an ad for a credit card before I got my number, but it didn't drone on too long. Generally, you'll hear ads related to businesses you're requesting to contact and will be given the opportunity to connect to the advertised business. But an ad here and there seems worth saving $1.50 a pop.

Cool. May the Verizon and Sprint 411 operators rot in hell.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 07:44 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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From Chuck Shepherd's column that, sadly, my local newspaper no longer carries, comes this little tidbit:

According to prosecutors, Irenia "Lamb" Cotner, 34, managed to enlist four adults in rural Claremont, Ill., to help her murder a pregnant 16-year-old girl, by convincing them they all had hexes on them that could only be lifted by killing the girl before a candle with her name on it melted down. (They failed, but a man died fighting off the attackers.) One defendant said the hex was real because she got migraines every time Cotner came by. Another defendant said he learned about hexes and spells so that people would like him and said Cotner planned the murder for a remote location so that the gates of hell could open for the mother's and fetus's souls. In December, Cotner was sentenced to 57 years in prison, and two others go on trial soon.

Other bizarre crap:

I don't know what the class was about. but a student handed in a disc containing kiddie porn as his final examination.

If he ate the soup, then I want the special.

Today, January 12, is Feast of Fabulous Men Day. Apparently crack has become more ubiquitous than I thought.

The Restaurant At the End of the Universe is one step closer to reality.

No word on whether Cop Rock was on the air at the time.

A blowtorch is not an FDA approved insecticide.

When asked by reporters if Governor Crist found the typo embarrassing, he replied "Not at all" and then proceeded to feed the entire press corp with a pack of M&Ms and a can of Diet Coke.

And let me finish with this thought.

Hey, how did that get in here? More to the point, how can more get in here?

Posted by: Physics Geek at 04:12 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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And it wasn't because of the taste.

European men are flocking to Bulgaria to buy 'breast-boosting beer' after EU accession led to customs duties on the drink being abolished.

The millet-ale called Boza which is made from fermented wheat flour and yeast is being snapped up by bar owners, shopkeepers and shoppers from across Europe.

They are said to be keen for their wives and girlfriends to benefit from its reported ability to make women's breasts grow.

Constantin Barbu crossed the Danube from Romania to buy Boza in the Bulgarian border town of Ruse.

He said: "I've bought a case for my wife to try out. I really hope I see an improvement."

Posted by: Physics Geek at 10:46 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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It's a new year and all, which means that it's time for Andrea's annual blog move. For the first time since I've been reading her stuff, she moved back onto an old site: Victory Soap. Please update your blogrolls.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 11:23 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Go here to find out what it is. And then offer your congratulations, if you so desire.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 01:21 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Thanks to the breaking of copyright laws everywhere magic of YouTube, someone has compiled the Top 12 Band appearances in movies. Very, very cool stuff.

Posted by: Physics Geek at 03:24 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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